i'm stuck. it's almost mid-february (only or already, depends on how you look at it) and i have the winter blues. the winter blahs. and i don't know how to get rid of it. i see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it is so freaking far away. and, now that we have had craploads of snow days off from school, there is no time off/break in the schedule in sight until the much shortened spring break in april. ugh. (i hate it when i hear myself complaining... sorry.) gotta figure out a way to live life in the present, but it's so hard to do when the present moment is not as great as i know it could be. gotta take it one moment, one step at a time. hold on. breathe. i have to look for little things to help me get through. it's just not easy right now. i miss my love so much. work is stressful and not fun. hate feeling empty, uninspired, and bored. i am fully aware of the fact that it is well within my power to change my current feelings/attitude, but right now, i just can't. i just feel it. and i know that it is good that i am allowing myself to feel this way instead of pretending everything is ok. so, here's the truth tonight: it's not ok right now. i miss my love. i just feel blah. want summer. please.

(why do i feel so guilty for writing this?)


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